Kerry - I stumbled into a conversation taking place between three of my girlfriends and one of our mutual guy friends, Marty. They were attempting to define the word "sexy" as a combination of a person's attractiveness and unattainability. Their speech acts were coherent because they were shaped by the episode of defining a word over dinner. The relationship between them, their self-identities, and their culture helped them to be talking about the same thing and understanding each other. The relationship between them is close and open, and not strained by any romantic interest. Each of the four has good self-esteem and receives assurance of their attractiveness from other friends. Thus, the conversants were less likely to be driven to "prove" anyone sexy. Finally, our Christian college culture shaped what was said. The word "sexy" was stripped of its emotional charge and defined as the more quantifiable "attractive and unattainable." This made the word safe to talk about, where it might otherwise have been too carnal for Christian discussion.