This Issues in Communication narrative is designed to provoke individual thought or discussion about concepts raised in the chapter.

Rachel and Val had been living together for nearly two months. Both had lived in campus housing previously; however, this experience was their first in an apartment. They enjoyed their newfound freedom from campus life. They were able to light candles and listen to mutually favorite artists like Melissa Ethridge while talking until wee hours of the night.

During one such conversation, Val told Rachel about some problems she was having with her supervisor at work: “I have been working at Org-Tec for over a year and have come up with some good ideas on how to make my work more efficient. They are simple things like tying my computer into the phone line, installing contact management software, and so forth,” Val said with a somewhat frustrated expression.

“You look like you’re upset about something,” replied Rachel. Val pondered the issue for a few moments before responding. “I just don’t feel like Ali takes my suggestions seriously. I have told her about my ideas a couple of times and she always says they are good, but nothing ever happens.” Rachel watched Val and nodded her head. “So Ali is your supervisor?”

“She is, and we were really good friends when I started working there. We spent quite a bit of time together—going to movies, eating lunch, things like that. She became really distant and stopped being friendly a few months ago and has actually been rude at times. I don’t know if I want to work there any more. I can get other jobs. . . .” Val became silent and looked at the candle dripping wax on the coffee table.

“Why don’t you put together a formal proposal? If you put it on paper, it will be harder for her to ignore and my experience is that people take the ideas more seriously. It will also make it look like you did your homework—Val, are you listening?”

“Oh, I’m sorry Rachel. I was lost in thought! I was just trying to figure out what I did to make Ali upset. What did you say?” The two continued talking, and Rachel described her suggestion in greater detail.

The next afternoon Val tentatively went to work after class. As she walked in the door, she saw Ali talking to another coworker. Val waited until the conversation was over and walked up to Ali saying, “Ali, I wanted to give you a memo I prepared that overviews my proposal for purchasing equipment which will make my work-station more productive. If you want to. . . .” Before Val could finish, Ali cut her off and responded, “I really am in a hurry Val; why don’t you just tell me what is on the memo and I. . . .”

Val had reached a boiling point and was ready to blow. This conversation was going like the two previous—Ali was blowing her off. “Ali,” Val said, “I don’t appreciate being interrupted and I certainly don’t appreciate your not even taking time to look over the proposal I drew up. I spent a lot of time on it and would like you to read it before rejecting the idea like you did all of the other times.” Val was shocked at her own outburst, and even a little embarrassed about it. “I’m sorry Ali. I didn’t mean to raise my voice. I just have been frustrated with you lately because it seemed like you were blowing my idea off. I thought that given the friendship we used to have, you would at least listen.”

“Val, put the memo on my desk, and I promise to read it. I have to run to a meeting with the partners so I won’t be able to get to it until this afternoon. From the looks of it, this should be an easy thing to have happen, OK?” As Ali smiled and walked away, Val could only think how ironic it was that she was probably going to get the needed equipment but felt even worse about the situation than before.

Apply what you have learned about listening as you ponder and discuss the following questions: How do people hear and not listen? What factors might have interfered with Val’s, Rachel’s, or Ali’s ability to listen? Explain how active, empathic, or critical listening could have been used to create a more positive scenario. What specific listening strategies could have been used to avoid this particular outcome?